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Who Should Take the Blame for Autism?
Last week, I saw yet another article that claimed to solve the mystery of autism. This time, it was gestational diabetes in the mother. It’s always something, isn’t it? Either autism is because of advanced paternal or maternal age, or the dot-com era, or people who eat gluten. the article...
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Why I Wasn’t Afraid to Label My Son
Dear Jack, When you were about year old, we saw a bunch of doctors and specialists to try and figure out why you didn’t talk or point or look at us. And at that time, many people told us not to rush to give you a label. “Be careful with a label, because it will be on all of his forms and...
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A Boy and His Dog
Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Wolfie. I am half Bichon and half Shih-Tzu, also known as a Teddy Bear Dog or a Zuchon. I am sixteen and a half pounds and I barely stand a foot off the floor, but do not let my size fool you. I may be small, but I am mighty. I’ve been with my family...
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Someone I’m With Has Autism
“Hey Carrie, it’s me, Sandy. Listen, I had an idea for you—” Sandy is a dog trainer. We started to work with her after we got our puppy, Wolfie, because we have no idea what we’re doing. “Oh, I’m so glad you called! I’m kind of worried he doesn’t like his food. He isn’t...
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Remember the Kayak
Carrie Cariello and her husband, Joe, live in New Hampshire. The have five children; four boys and one girl. Their second son, Jack, has autism. (No, their daughter, Rose, is not the youngest. The youngest is Henry, a child born nine months after the urologist canceled Joe’s...
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When Your Grandchild Has Autism
I’m always struck at the number of grandparents who turn up at the public reading I have been doing since publishing my book. During the discussion afterwards they usually ask similar questions; “I have a granddaughter with autism. What should I do when she flaps her hands?” or, “Why do...
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The Sex Talk
So, we’ve got this guy in middle school now. And he is all sorts of cool. Savvy. Phrases like let’s play have been replaced by let’s hang out. He makes scrambled egg sandwiches for himself in the morning and wants to walk home from the bus stop alone in the afternoon. There is swagger in...
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Epic Scenes from a Barbershop
Yesterday afternoon I poked my head into the family room where Jack, Charlie, and Henry were sprawled watching Scooby Doo, and announced we were going for haircuts. “No!” they shouted in unison. “No haircuts!” I told them we’d stop at the school book fair first, and jollied them out...
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What is Normal?
Nearly every day someone asks me something like, “When did you know that Jack wasn’t normal?” And then they stop themselves, stammer a bit, and apologize for saying normal. Their faces turn all red and they look away and stare at their feet. “I mean, you know, what’s normal, there is no...
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What Color is Monday?
“What color do you see for Monday?” my son Jack asked as I heaved a chicken into the oven. “What?” I said distractedly, turning from the oven to slice some potatoes at the counter. It was late afternoon one day last fall, and I was preparing dinner and managing the demands of homework...
