Please note: The terms Aspie, ASD/Neurodivergent, and Autistics will be used to refer to people with Autism.
A quick Google search for “supporting” or “empowering” Autistic people brings up pages recounting our impairments and suggested accommodations in education and employment. In the workplace, being Autism-Friendly means to “speak to the employee directly about what helps them be productive… [Because the] work environment can have a significant impact on the degree to which autistic professionals feel comfortable and able to focus on their work” (Sommer, 2024).
Support is important in nearly all circumstances. Aspies are surrounded by Neurotypicals (NTs) who often know little about ASD. Integration in schools and workplaces means more opportunities for those who are higher functioning. And yet, Neurotypical co-workers still expect autistic people to fit in or get out because our natural way of being is at odds with societal norms (Jasmin, 2024). In spite of the laws requiring employers to accommodate autistic workers, requesting adjustments means at least minimal disclosure of one’s disability. Furthermore, not all Aspies are willing to “unmask” in order to ask for adjustments.
A Neurodivergent disability advocate on LinkedIn, Ben Van Hook, recently wrote, “If you want to know why disabled people are afraid to unmask and are unable to ‘bring their whole selves to work’… [or] disclose and share their stories… When we unmask…When we show any glimmer of our authentic selves…We become subject to hatred, abuse, harassment, or worse – physical and psychological violence. People see us as immature. People see us as unemployable, incompetent, or incapable. People see us as deficient, inferior, and unworthy of being seen or treated as a human being. … The problem is… society has not given us…a reason to feel safe being our true authentic selves without facing serious backlash or repercussions” (Van Hook, 2024).
Individual Needs Inform Accommodations
“Research finds that autistic people… face problems in the workplace, including changing careers regularly and struggling to navigate workplace relationships… Autistic people tend to respond well to set ways of working and routines,” (Jack, 2022) as long as the rules make sense.
Some of our difficulties arise from myths, such as Aspies being rude, lacking empathy and social skills, and not being able to form loving relationships. Autism is still stereotyped as a male condition, disadvantaging women and non-binary people who may go undiagnosed and unsupported—especially if we’re unable to articulate our support needs.
Some people are afraid of us due to the myth that all Aspies are violent. Or they may tell us that we can’t be autistic because we don’t look autistic. In a former workplace, one co-worker told me exactly that, while another asked (before my diagnosis) if I was autistic because she saw similarities in me that were evident in her autistic daughter.
Legal and Organizational Supports
Legal and organizational approaches to empowering autistic people involve school and workplace adjustments that benefit institutions and organizations as much or more than autistic individuals. Accommodations such as quiet breaks, noise-canceling headphones, organizers, and time extensions on assignments or job completion may augment our productivity and industry profits but do not necessarily change attitudes.
“When members of the public envision the disability of autism, they most likely envision a child, rather than an adult,” reads a 2011 article called “Infantilizing Autism.” And certainly, many autistic adults have faced this firsthand. Some of us might feel like it’s hard to be heard or taken seriously at work, and condescending reactions to things like stimming in public can only make matters worse… Autistic adults should be trusted to complete their assigned tasks, but support should also be readily available to them. Asking for support, even long past the probation period or indefinitely, should not be framed as them putting a burden on management or as a personal failing (Laube, 2022).
Empowerment Barriers
The greatest hurdles to acceptance and genuine inclusion of Autistics are the stigma and discrimination to which we’re subjected. Praslova (2021) expresses it as follows:
“Feeling excluded and invisible is typical for neurodivergent people. Pop culture narratives make this worse. We are often infantilized or portrayed as unemotional (almost robotic) people who love tech or who struggle to triumphantly overcome everyday woes. Reducing us to stereotypes and ‘othering’ us shapes how we are perceived by others and by ourselves. The result is an overwhelming number of autistic people who feel isolated, misunderstood, and discriminated against in life and at work.
If you are neurotypical, or part of any majority group, you likely see reflections of yourself wherever you look: on billboards, in magazines, while watching your favorite TV shows, in novels and in movies… [I]f all of that was taken away… You would feel alone. You might even lack the tools you [need]…to explain those feelings to other people, because you would have to do more work to seek out and discover them. I even invented a word for this feeling – unincludable…[W]e are not the problem. Rather, it is miseducation surrounding what it means to be autistic and neurodivergent — especially in the workplace” (Praslova, 2021).
#ActuallyAutistic Perspective
As an autistic person and a mental health systemic advocate, I know it is hard to change ingrained attitudes. “As a society, we may find significant limits in our ability to acknowledge and reduce racist thinking and behavior [because ableist and] racist attitudes are often unconscious” (Ashraf and Dennis, 2021).
“[E]xclusion may not always be intended to cause psychological harm, [but] exclusion can have detrimental outcomes in terms of emotional and behavioral health, academic difficulties, a decrease in prosocial behavior, and low self-esteem” (Mulvey, Boswell, and Zheng, 2017).
Even some “[D]octors assume that having a disability inevitably leads to a low quality of life. This is based on the idea that someone can only have a high quality of life if they are nondisabled…This bias…can cause medical professionals to ignore the lived experiences of their patients, incorrectly blame new symptoms on a person’s disability, or withdraw medical support in the belief that nothing they do will help” (Villines, 2021).
Such attitudes are anything but supportive. So, from an autistic point of view, what might empower us to realize our best possible life?
Is Emotional Care the Missing Piece?
Education helps, but it’s important to ensure that those around us are educated as to what is and isn’t true about autism. I believe, given the widespread misunderstanding and misinformation that leads to the pervasive stigma, the vital human need for emotional care is lacking.
Caring Support
Caring is essential for anyone’s overall well-being and happiness. Caring establishes connections, fosters empathy, and promotes a sense of belonging. When people feel cared for, they experience a greater sense of security and emotional support (Types of Caring: From Empathy to Support, 2023)
Caring takes various forms, each addressing distinct aspects of a person’s well-being. For this article, my focus is on Emotional Care.
Emotional Care
Emotional care is a humanity-affirming practice that recognizes and supports individual capabilities without trying to ‘correct’ them. It emphasizes the importance of supporting the holistic well-being of individuals, including [Autistic] mental, emotional, physical, and social health. There are transformative powers within neurodiversity-affirming practices (Sara, 2024). These methods and approaches are not just clinical tools or educational strategies; they are pathways to understanding, acceptance, and genuine support for people.
“Relationships and social connectivity play an important role in physical and psychological well-being. Relationships are…important for autistic well-being; autistic loneliness is related to poor mental health, including increased depression and anxiety), self-harm, and suicidality. Close relationships with others give autistic people a space to experience emotional reciprocity, to express their emotions, exchange ideas, collaborate and cooperate, and practice interpersonal skills” (Crompton et al., 2020).
Active listening, expressing empathy, and validating another’s emotions assures them that you want to understand what they are going through, allowing them to feel heard and understood.
“Emotional care is not limited to specific relationships or professions… Anyone can practice it by offering a listening ear to a friend, supporting a co-worker, or providing care within a healthcare setting. By understanding and practicing emotional care, we can create a more compassionate and supportive world” (Types of Caring: From Empathy to Support, 2023).
It seems ironic that emotional support and empathy—traits many Neurotypical people accuse Aspies of lacking—could be a significant key to greater neuro-inclusivity. But again, a quick review of online literature reveals a pervasive sense that NTs do not like Autistic people (Alkhaldi, et al., 2021). Our tendency to isolate ourselves from NT society is often blamed, as are our most fundamental traits, which many NTs simply do not understand. To connect with others, many Aspies would rather spend time with other Neurodivergent people.
Wrapping up
Governments around the world are working on strategies to empower and include autistic people in all aspects of life. However, some autistics may view these as perfunctory or symbolic efforts that fail to remove social barriers, leading autistic people to continue masking their true selves. Rejection, marginalization, and the message that everything intrinsic to us is wrong or unacceptable is a continuous source of trauma (Natri, 2021).
Nothing about autistic people deserves exclusion. Inclusion and acceptance are human needs. We happen to be human beings who are Autistic and feeling that someone cares could be as important to our well-being as any learning or workplace adjustments.
Annie Kent, MA, received her psychology degree at Lakehead University in Thunder Bay, Ontario, Canada. She spent 20-some years working in public sector disability, mental health, and infectious diseases advocacy and education. Diagnosed with three closely related types of neurodiversity, employer lack of awareness and understanding led to burnout and early retirement. However, she remains an active advocate, always learning and engaging remotely with Autism and ADHD organizations and forums. For more information, visit her website, www.aspiefemmepress.ca, or email Annie at ajollymo@lakeheadu.ca.
References
Alkhaldi, Rabi Samil, Sheppard, Elizabeth, Burdett, Emily, and Mitchell, Peter. Do Neurotypical People Like or Dislike Autistic People? PubMed Central, Autism Adulthood. September 2021; 3(3): 275–279. Published online 2021 September 2. doi:10.1089/aut.2020.0059 www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8992906/
Crompton, C. J., Hallett, S., Ropar, D., Flynn, E., & Fletcher-Watson, S. (2020). “I never realised everybody felt as happy as I do when I am around autistic people”: A thematic analysis of autistic adults’ relationships with autistic and neurotypical friends and family. Autism, 24(6), 136236132090897. doi.org/10.1177/1362361320908976
Jack, Claire, (2022, November 18). Why Autistic People Can Struggle in the Workplace, Psychology Today. www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/women-autism-spectrum-disorder/202211/why-autistic-people-can-struggle-in-the-workplace
Jasmin, Kyle, (2024, January 11) How Autistic Individuals Adapt to a Neurotypical World, Psychology Today. www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/sound-minds/202401/how-autistic-individuals-adapt-to-a-neurotypical-world
Mulvey, K. L., Boswell, C., & Zheng, J. (2017). Causes and consequences of social exclusion and peer rejection among children and adolescents. National Center for Biotechnology Information National Library of Medicine; Rep Emot Behav Disord Youth 17(3): 71–75. www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6085085
Natri, Heini, (2021, October 26) How and Why Neurotypicals Misunderstand and Mistreat Autistic People. Mad In America. www.madinamerica.com/2021/10/neurotypicals-misunderstand-mistreat-autistic-people/
Praslova, L. (2021, December 14). Autism Doesn’t Hold People Back at Work. Discrimination Does. Harvard Business Review. hbr.org/2021/12/autism-doesn’t-hold-people-back-at-work-discrimination-does
Sara. (2024, February 8). Neurodiversity-Affirming Practices: A Guide to Inclusive and Supportive Strategies. Learning for a Purpose; Learning for a Purpose. learningforapurpose.com/neurodiversity-affirming-practices/
Sommer, V. (2023, December 15). Ten ways to create an autism-friendly work environment | Full Fabric. Www.fullfabric.com; Full Fabric. www.fullfabric.com/articles/ten-ways-to-create-an-autism-friendly-work-environment
Types of Caring: From Empathy to Support. (2023, December 15). Www.ultimatecareny.com; Ultimate Care. www.ultimatecareny.com/resources/types-of-caring
VanHook, Ben. (2024, August 23) If you want to know why disabled people are afraid to unmask and are unable to “bring their whole selves [LinkedIn page], www.linkedin.com › in › ben-vanhook-970041168
Villines, Z. (2021, November 8). Ableism: What It Means, History, Types, Examples, How It’s Harmful. Verywell Mind. www.verywellmind.com
